Here's the full article with amusing quotes about marriage:
Marriage, a union that's as old as time, inspires myriad emotions and experiences. It's celebrated for its companionship and cherished for its unique quirks. We've compiled a collection of amusing quotes that capture the essence and eccentricities of matrimonial life. These quotes reflect the good, the bewildering, and the downright hilarious moments couples navigate together. Whether you're married, planning to marry, or just curious, you'll find insight and laughter in the wisdom of these words. From witty reflections to humorous observations, enjoy this light-hearted take on marriage through the lens of comedic commentary.
Funny Quotes on Matrimony
"Marriage is a workshop... where the husband works and the wife shops." – Unknown
"Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age—as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight." – Phyllis Diller
"My wife and I were happy for 20 years – then we met." – Rodney Dangerfield
"Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them." – Ogden Nash
"A husband is someone who after taking the trash out gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house." – Unknown
"Marriage: a legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of opposite sex solemnly bind themselves to harass one another for life." – Ambrose Bierce
"Marry someone who has a different favorite cereal than you so they won't eat all of yours." – Unknown
"Marriage is not just spiritual communion; it is also remembering to take out the trash." – Joyce Brothers
"Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. After a while, you wish you had a club and a spade." – Unknown
"In marriage, 'yes dear' is the magic word." – Unknown
"Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband." – Unknown
"Marriage is the chief cause of divorce." – Groucho Marx
Marriage Quotes That Make You Laugh
"I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." – Rita Rudner
"The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret." – Henny Youngman
"Love is blind. Marriage is the eye-opener." – Pauline Thomason
"Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it." – Helen Rowland
"Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet." – Mae West
"When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife." – Prince Philip
"Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot." – Minnie Pearl
"A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished." – Zsa Zsa Gabor
"Marriage is like a phonograph record. It starts off on a high note and ends up in a distinctive spiral." – Anonymous
"Marriage is an adventure, like going to war." – G. K. Chesterton
"Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too." – H. L. Mencken
"The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.'" – Unknown
Quotes About Marriage and Chaos
"A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers." – Ruth Bell Graham
"Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them." – Ogden Nash
"In my house, I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision-maker." – Woody Allen
"I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always." – Unknown
"Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy." – Francois de La Rochefoucauld
"When you’re married, you want to have a march to one spot, make sure to duck." – Unknown
"A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband." – Michel de Montaigne
"Marriage is finding that one person who puts up with your craziness, congratulates you on your weirdness, and still loves you." – Unknown
"My wife told me that I should learn to embrace my mistakes. I met her with open arms." – Unknown
"To keep your marriage brimming with love in the wedding cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it. Whenever you’re right, shut up." – Ogden Nash
"Marriage is a work in progress requiring regular updates and patches." – Unknown
"Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life." – Unknown
Quotes on Marriage and Friendship
"Marriage is not about age; it's about finding the right person." – Sophia Bush
"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." – Unknown
"The happiest marriages are secrets because they not only find a partner but a friend." – Unknown
"Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings... and lawyers." – Richard Pryor
"Marriage is a lot of work, but so is living together." – Unknown
"This is what marriage means: You fight over a dinner. You disagree. You promote yourselves and become better people." – Unknown
"Let your wife and your children act like it is the end of the world when you brag about doing the dishes." – Unknown
"By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher." – Socrates
"Marriage is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill but respect for not doing it." – Unknown
"A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short." – André Maurois
"My husband said he needed more space... So I locked him outside." – Unknown
"Marriage is the art of living together with such familiarity that you can finish each other's sentences." – Unknown
Witty Marriage Quotes
"Marriages are made in heaven... but so again, are thunder and lightning." – Unknown
"Every marriage is a battlefield, but becoming a veteran pays off." – Unknown
"Engagement rings: a shiny, small piece of the marriage trap." – Unknown
"Marriage means you never have to speak again because she already knows exactly what you will say next." – Unknown
"No one can ever be truly prepared for marriage; you just learn as you go." – Unknown
"Spouses are like tires; sometimes you want a spare, and sometimes you just want to pump them up." – Unknown
"When love is real, you learn to share everything from a bag of chips to your life’s deepest secrets." – Unknown
"Marriage mart is like a game of poker – learn to fold before it's over." – Unknown
"Marriage is the main process for introducing new humans to the world. It's like a club." – Unknown
"Marriage is your lifetime subscription to someone's quirks." – Unknown
"A married man is like a borderless country. Change is inevitable." – Unknown
"In marriage, you can never win an argument but can sleep on all disagreements." – Unknown
Cheerful Quotes About the Married Life
"Marriage is the miracle that transforms a spouse into a lifelong friend." – Unknown
"Stay married and see if you can hold out longer than the previous generation." – Unknown
"More than a bond, marriage is a partnership daring to grow." – Unknown
"Years of love paired with annoying habits – that is marriage." – Unknown
"Few marriages need therapy; they just need fun and open life experiences." – Unknown
"Marriage is watching your man pick up multiple pizzas at the grocery store without checking of they got his favorite toppings." – Unknown
"Marriage lies at the heart of every romantic comedy with a big laugh." – Unknown
"Life after marriage is one long vacation with more chats at the breakfast table." – Unknown
"Love corrections matter while faults do not remain permanent; such is marriage." – Unknown
"Marriage freezes love for eternity, moments lock onto happiness shared in partnership." – Unknown
"Young ones may never know, but marriage is life lived in partnership." – Unknown
"With love, marriage is a story that ends but never tires." – Unknown
Humorous Quotes on Married Life
"The art of marriage is letting go of attachment to whom once ruled your heart." – Unknown
"Laughter and love always dissolve life's stresses in marriage." – Unknown
"Love will strike you blind, though marriage infects you with wisdom." – Unknown
"Fix or fade: this, dear reader, is the meaning of married friendship." – Unknown
"You can which makes one laugh and love endlessly every day." – Unknown
"Marriage isn’t for friendly old conversations; they need not go above the roar of a washing machine!" – Unknown
"Marriage binds you! by love as life’s riddles demand effective solutions." – Unknown
"The pure sound of love keeps you living lifetales in real time through marriage's stages." – Unknown
"Marriage shows the power of friends when the chips are down." – Unknown
"View marriage with love – even if it’s for the most lodgings to go rambling in." – Unknown
"Longing will merge and meditatively improve our own relationships even as marriage bears bumps." – Unknown
"And patience will guide marriage like nothing on earth." – Unknown
Amusing Quotes About Lasting Marriages
"Marriage is a mural depicting the heart's unending drive toward satisfaction." – Unknown
"Try propelling yourself toward lasting happinesse marriage's burnout may get you on track." – Unknown
"Marriage pauses time where love serves both couples and family lasting impressions." – Unknown
"What better than satisfication to carry friendships long beyond the dance of life?" – Unknown
"Married people don’t care about mood as long as love fills optimism every breakfast plate." – Unknown
"Peace of heart unlocks lasting love gifts environed by marriage's peace inner stability." – Unknown
"Dread not! But dance through marriage shared hearts fulfill perfect days." – Unknown
"Many hope marriage unearths joy too!" – Unknown
"Happiness keeps marriage stress balanced, not life’s burnout." – Unknown
"Marriage like a trust experiment might verify life's partnership through love." – Unknown
"With love and friendship our hearts elevate life’s stages skyward forever heralding promises!" – Unknown
"Marriage and love create memories that will last our entire life!" – Unknown
Light-hearted Quotes on Marriage Adventures
"Marriage promises peace where you work to unravel life's riddles." – Unknown
"True life partnerships capture spirit on a full tank of laughter." – Unknown
"Marriage encounters demand mind opening, discovery through trust." – Unknown
"Leave stress for real engagements: life’s love experience." – Unknown
"Real people revitalize life journeys as stages in friendship and love adventures." – Unknown
"Trust masterfully through life marriage teamwork." – Unknown
"Is it madness from heart strings carved by life dreams?" – Unknown
"Marriage makes our hearts travel roads in wonder’s parachute!" – Unknown
"Sharing life’s experience captures next glorious steps impacting marriage." – Unknown
"Marriage keeps those in love mighty proximity best considering lifetime ideas." – Unknown
"Thrills in love grow where commitment evolves life’s ultimate embrace." – Unknown
"If love is a game, marriage fulfills team ideas gifting spirit to time itself." – Unknown
Surprising Thoughts on Marriage Through Quotes
"Marriage's warmth invites both partners to life stages above life." – Unknown
"Don’t fear delight! Share life curves and love keeps keeping marriage in harmony." – Unknown
"Accepting change, marriage's games preserve laughter with love." – Unknown
"Lifefulfilledly understands the world through marriage’s heart pledged adventures." – Unknown
"One golden rule works for marriages underscoring life’s harmony together." – Unknown
"Two people leap adventures growing mindful when marriage hit life’s obstacles." – Unknown
"Humor’s balance will unravel life’s joy through marriage dreams." – Unknown
"Master heartombined marriage stages in one love belonging story." – Unknown
"Excuse life’s trials while marriage explores healthy life partnerships." – Unknown
"And in making marriage, love nourishes family devotion." – Unknown
"Keep life joy marriage far beyond life's tasks." – Unknown
"Belief keeps marriage alive providing truth within cavernous life spark." – Unknown
Final words
Marriage is life's adventure full of challenge and humor, pushing couples to new experiences and often accompanied by delectable doses of amusement. It’s a mix, a joyous blend that combines love, camaraderie, and a dash of chaos for good measure. As showcased by legendary comedic minds and endless anonymous wisdom, marriage remains as a magnificent union that holds laughter prominent while sustaining life's evolving commitment. Comedic moments turn essential life efforts, ensuring couples remember that love means adventure alongside quirky understandings of human nature. Turning Times through marriage magnifies life's shared experience thus echoing humanity’s spirited side. Embrace quotes, for they imparts life within love partnerships, channelizing couples toward joyful life endeavors. So whether laughing out loud or loving life’s thoughtful stirring, keep marriage eternal, brilliantly fun side flowing into each new day!
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