100+ Unforgettable Caddyshack Quotes: Timeless Humor and Wit
In this article, we explore the timeless humor and unforgettable charm of *Caddyshack*, a classic film that has left an indelible mark on comedy cinema. We've curated a collection of quotes that capture the film’s wit and whimsy, organized under ten imaginative subtitles. The unique style of *Caddyshack* continues to resonate, offering snippets of comedy gold that are at once hilarious and insightful. Whether you're seeking things to say straight from the greens of Bushwood Country Club or hoping to channel your inner Ty Webb, these quotes are sure to hit a hole-in-one when it comes to capturing essence. Dive into the sections below for a dose of nostalgia and a laugh that transcends the fairway.
"Don't sell yourself short, you're a tremendous slouch." – Judge Smails
"In the immortal words of Jean Paul Sartre, 'Au revoir, gopher'." – Carl Spackler
"I'm alright, don't nobody worry 'bout me." – Soundtrack
"This crowd has gone deadly silent, a Cinderella story outta nowhere." – Carl Spackler
"I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn't want to do it. I felt I owed it to them." – Judge Smails
"I'd keep playing. I don't think the heavy stuff is gonna come down for quite a while." – Carl Spackler
"That's the ugliest hat I've ever seen. You buy a hat like that, I bet you get a free bowl of soup." – Al Czervik
"It was about 455 yards away, but I got all of it." – Ty Webb
"A flute with no holes is not a flute. And a doughnut with no hole is a Danish." – Ty Webb
"You don't need to shoot the ball for it to go in the hole." – Ty Webb
"Golf courses and cemeteries are the biggest wasters of prime real estate." – Al Czervik
"I'm going to put that tape on my boat." – Al Czervik
"You'll get nothing and like it!" – Judge Smails
"It's easy to grin when your ship comes in. But a man worthwhile is a man who can smile when his shorts are too tight in the seat." – Judge Smails
"We have a pond in the back. We have a pool and a pond. Pond would be good for you." – Ty Webb
"Cannonball it!" – Carl Spackler
"This isn't Russia. Is this Russia? This isn't Russia, is it?" – Ty Webb
"Thank you very little." – Ty Webb
"The Zen philosopher Basho once wrote, 'A flute with no holes is not a flute'." – Ty Webb
"You take drugs, Danny?" – Ty Webb
"Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir, and I never slice." – Judge Smails
"It's in the hole!" – Carl Spackler
"I'm going to end up working in a lumberyard the rest of my life." – Carl Spackler
"He's on his final hole. The crowd has gone silent. Cinderella story." – Carl Spackler
"License to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations." – Carl Spackler
"You must plan your attack very carefully." – Carl Spackler
"A little something for the effort, you know." – Carl Spackler
"You’re rather attractive for a beautiful girl with a great body." – Ty Webb
"This is a hybrid. This is a cross, ah, of bluegrass, Kentucky bluegrass, featherbed bent, and northern California sinsemilla." – Carl Spackler
"Okay, Pookie, do the night-putting." – Ty Webb
"You know, that's the first time I’ve ever seen you look ugly." – Ty Webb
"Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion." – Carl Spackler
"All you do is for the good of the land, the sweat of your brow." – Carl Spackler
"He’s a Cinderella boy. A former greenskeeper now about to become the Masters champion." – Carl Spackler
"Do you always have to talk about politics at parties?" – Lacy Underall
"Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must’ve been something before electricity." – Al Czervik
"Be the ball, Danny." – Ty Webb
"This is the worst-looking hat I ever saw. When you buy a hat like this I bet you get a free bowl of soup." – Al Czervik
"I hear this place is restricted, Wang, so don't tell 'em you're Jewish, okay?" – Al Czervik
"As far as you know, I’m dead." – Ty Webb
"I'm not, I'm not, I’m not, I mean, I'm not like, I'm not like a gopher." – Carl Spackler
"Let me just clean everything off here." – Ty Webb
"You're rather attractive for a beautiful girl with a great body." – Ty Webb
"Do you do drugs, Danny, every day?" – Ty Webb
"Thank you very little." – Ty Webb
"Uh, Sandy, can't dance, and it's hard to find a woman these days who can’t cook." – Al Czervik
"I'm hot today." – Ty Webb
"Hey everybody, we're all gonna get laid!" – Al Czervik
"Dead? How do you become that highly decorated?" – Al Czervik
"You take drugs, Danny?" – Ty Webb
"I hear this place is restricted, so don’t tell them you’re Jewish." – Al Czervik
"I almost got head from Amelia Earhart." – Al Czervik
"Where’d it go? Right in the lumberyard." – Ty Webb
"You'll get nothing, and like it!" – Judge Smails
"You're not, uh, you're not good at sports, are you?" – Al Czervik
"Well, you buy a hat like this, I bet you get a free bowl of soup." – Al Czervik
"I’m having a party this fourth of July, and I’d love you to come." – Carl Spackler
"This is a hybrid… cross… of bluegrass, Kentucky bluegrass, featherbed bent, and Northern California sinsemilla." – Carl Spackler
"Oh, a young guy sleeps over at your house. What was I supposed to do, call him 'Mr.' all night?" – Judge Smails
"Your mother told me to tell you to keep away from me." – Carl Spackler
"Danny, see your future; be your future." – Ty Webb
"How'd you like to mow my lawn?" – Judge Smails
"What are we, waiting for these? Hello everybody, Mr. Wang, you sound beautiful." – Al Czervik
"I have no respect for people with no shopping agenda." – Ty Webb
"To honor your invitation to spend time with you is a sad day in my life that I will remember." – Al Czervik
"Oh, doctah, you must have been something before anonymesthesia." – Al Czervik
"You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours." – Judge Smails
"Do you mind, I think I’m about to pass gas." – Al Czervik
"You buy a hat like this, you get a free bowl of soup." – Judge Smails
"Well, the world needs ditch diggers, too." – Judge Smails
"Just be the ball, be the ball, be the ball. You're not being the ball, Danny." – Ty Webb
"It’s easy to grin when your ship comes in, and you’ve got the stock market beat, but the man worthwhile is the man who can smile when his shorts are too tight in the seat." – Judge Smails
"Whoa, did somebody step on a duck?" – Al Czervik
"Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it." – Al Czervik
"What brings you to this nape of the woods, neck of the wape; how come you’re here?" – Judge Smails
"Hey, everybody, we're all gonna get laid!" – Al Czervik
"He called me a baboon, thinks I'm his wife." – Carl Spackler
"I bet you were something before electricity." – Al Czervik
"The man's a menace to society." – Judge Smails
"I should've stayed in school like they taught me." – Al Czervik
"Someone else would not have done it any differently." – Al Czervik
"I want you to kill every gopher on the course." – Judge Smails
"I give you anxiety." – Al Czervik
"This your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must have been something before electricity." – Al Czervik
"You do drugs, Danny?" – Ty Webb
"You must plan your attack very carefully." – Carl Spackler
"Mmmmmm, cannonball it." – Carl Spackler
"Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." – Carl Spackler
"Looks good on you, though." – Al Czervik
"Dammit, where is he? I’ve always wanted to see a guy get hit by lightning." – Dr. Beeper
"He called me a baboon; he thinks I'm his wife." – Carl Spackler
"Oh, people will never understand the thirst of a great man to give and to love generously." – Carl Spackler
"I tell ya, by goodness won't own ya." – Carl Spackler
"We have a pool and a pond. The pond would be good for you." – Ty Webb
"Thank you very little." – Ty Webb
"He spit on me!" – Ty Webb
"Cinderella story, outta nowhere, a former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion." – Carl Spackler
"I've often thought of becoming a golf club so I could honor my dreams." – Carl Spackler
"You're rather attractive for a beautiful girl with a great body." – Ty Webb
"It looks like I'm a wreck. It's in the hole! It’s in the hole!" – Carl Spackler
"Do you take drugs, Danny? Every day? Good." – Ty Webb
"To the lumberyard." – Ty Webb
"It’s easy to grin when you’re in the hole." – Judge Smails
"Whoa, I got you right in the lumberyard." – Ty Webb
"Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort." – Carl Spackler
"Remember Danny, two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left." – Ty Webb
"Nice shot, son." – Judge Smails
"How would you like to mow my lawn?" – Judge Smails
"The shortest distance between two points is a straight line in the opposite direction." – Ty Webb
"Do you take drugs, Danny? Every day? Good." – Ty Webb
"If you blame yourself, I’ll remember. If you blame others, I’ll never forgive you." – Carl Spackler
"The man's a menace!" – Judge Smails
"This is the worst looking hat I ever saw. When you buy a hat like this I bet you get a free bowl of soup." – Al Czervik
"What brings you to this nape of the woods, neck of the wape; how come you're here?" – Judge Smails
"I smell varmint poontang." – Carl Spackler
"Don't sell yourself short Judge, you're a tremendous slouch." – Judge Smails
"Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir, and I never slice." – Judge Smails
"Oh, I should have stayed home and played with myself." – Al Czervik
"What an incredible Cinderella story. This unknown, comes out of nowhere to lead the pack." – Carl Spackler
"Well, the world needs ditch diggers, too." – Judge Smails
