Welcome to an exploration of the witty and incisive world of Dorothy Parker through her unforgettable quotes. Dorothy Parker, a celebrated writer and satirist, is known for her sharp, sardonic wit and clever observations about life, love, and human nature. This article delves into various themes encapsulated by Parker's quotes, offering a glimpse of her literary genius and timeless relevance. With ten sub-themes, each illustrating different facets of her insight, these quotes are sure to entertain and provoke thought, resonating with those who appreciate humor intertwined with depth.
Love and Relationships Quotes
"If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to."
"Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone."
"Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves."
"The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity."
"That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment."
"I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true."
"You can't teach an old dogma new tricks."
"If you want to see what God thinks of money, just look at the people He gave it to."
"The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue."
"I hate writing, I love having written."
"Women and elephants never forget."
"Four be the things I’d been better without: love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt."
Society and Culture Quotes
"Don’t look at me in that tone of voice."
"All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends."
"She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B."
"Tell him I was too fucking busy—or vice versa."
"What fresh hell is this?"
"This wasn’t just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it."
"The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant—and let the air out of the tires."
"I require three things in a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid."
"It's not the tragedies that kill us, it's the messes."
"Brevity is the soul of lingerie."
"A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika."
"Scratch a lover, and find a foe."
Wit and Humor Quotes
"If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people he gave it to."
"I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it."
"I like to have a martini, two at the very most. After three I’m under the table, after four I’m under my host."
"Sorrow is tranquility remembered in emotion."
"Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician."
"The only 'ism' Hollywood believes in is plagiarism."
"I shall stay the way I am because I do not give a damn."
"There’s a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words."
"This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force."
"Living well is the best revenge."
"You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think."
"It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard."
Work and Ambition Quotes
"The two most beautiful words in the English language are 'cheque enclosed.'"
"I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true."
"Work is the province of cattle."
"My landlady never served Parker House rolls without muskrat meat in them."
"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy."
"If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy."
"I tried to tell the truth with some grace."
"The nice thing about being a writer is that you can make magic happen without paying stagehands to move the scenery."
"I've learned that almost anyone will put up with anything if it can be done on a European tour."
"I hate writing. I love having written."
"Constant use had not worn ragged the fabric of their friendship."
"The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant—and let the air out of the tires."
Life and Mortality Quotes
"Life is a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporanea; and love is a thing that can never go wrong; and I am Marie of Romania."
"You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks."
"It’s not the tragedies that kill us, it’s the messes."
"Those who have mastered etiquette, who are entirely, impeccably right, would seem to arrive at a point of exquisite dullness."
"It's not the tragedies that kill us, it's the messes."
"Living well is the best revenge."
"Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave."
"This wasn’t just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it."
"I shall stay the way I am because I do not give a damn."
"Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone."
"Scratch a lover and find a foe."
"Excuse my dust."
Friendship Quotes
"Constant use had not worn ragged the fabric of their friendship."
"A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika."
"These are not books, lumps of lifeless paper, but minds alive on the shelves."
"Brevity is the soul of lingerie."
"Four be the things I am wiser to know: Idleness, sorrow, a friend, and a foe."
"Friendship is like money, easier made than kept."
"If you want to see what God thinks of money, just look at the people He gave it to."
"Tell him I was too fucking busy—or vice versa."
"Guns aren’t lawful, nooses give, gas smells awful, you might as well live."
"The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant—and let the air out of the tires."
"Too fucking busy, and vice versa."
"You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think."
Cynicism and Satire Quotes
"Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporanea; and love is a thing that can never go wrong; and I am Marie of Romania."
"I require three things in a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid."
"Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician."
"They sicken of the calm, who knew the storm."
"There’s a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words."
"It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard."
"Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave."
"If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to."
"This can't last. This misery can't last."
"Ducking for apples — change one letter and it's the story of my life."
"The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity."
"If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me."
Heartbreak and Nostalgia Quotes
"Scratch a lover, and find a foe."
"All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends."
"It's not the tragedies that kill us, it's the messes."
"Four be the things I’d been better without: love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt."
"This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force."
"A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika."
"That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment."
"Living well is the best revenge."
"If you want to see what God thinks of money, just look at the people He gave it to."
"You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks."
"Too fucking busy, and vice versa."
"Excuse my dust."
Literary Wisdom Quotes
"The two most beautiful words in the English language are 'cheque enclosed.'"
"The only 'ism' Hollywood believes in is plagiarism."
"They sicken of the calm, who knew the storm."
"This wasn’t just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it."
"Those who have mastered etiquette, who are entirely, impeccably right, would seem to arrive at a point of exquisite dullness."
"She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B."
"I shall stay the way I am because I do not give a damn."
"Guns aren’t lawful, nooses give, gas smells awful, you might as well live."
"A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika."
"Sorrow is tranquility remembered in emotion."
"This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force."
"Excuse my dust."
Timeless Observations Quotes
"Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves."
"If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me."
"I hate writing. I love having written."
"Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician."
"A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika."
"My landlady never served Parker House rolls without muskrat meat in them."
"Tell him I was too fucking busy—or vice versa."
"There’s a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words."
"Brevity is the soul of lingerie."
"The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity."
"Living well is the best revenge."
"Too fucking busy, and vice versa."
Final words
In her body of work, Dorothy Parker captured the essence of the human experience with a keen eye and cutting wit, leaving behind a rich legacy of humor and insight. Her quotes continue to resonate with readers today, a testament to her unrivaled prowess in expressing truths wrapped in satire and irony. From her observations on love and relationships, cynicism and culture, to the complexities of life and friendship, Parker's quotes offer both entertainment and profound reflection. Her timeless voice encourages us to view the world through a lens of humor and skepticism, challenging norms and inviting introspection. Whether through her biting social commentary or her personal musings, Dorothy Parker remains a literary powerhouse, her wit as sharp now as it was in her time. May her words inspire and amuse you, offering comfort and laughter in equal measure.
