100+ Hilarious Movie Quotes That Went Viral on Social Media

"I'm sorry, I don't speak idiot."

"Well, that was a sharp left turn into crazy town."

"You had me at hello… then you lost me at 'I’m a professional mime.'"

"Of course I’m not lying. Do I look like I have a face that lies?"

"I’d explain it to you, but I don’t have any crayons with me."

"Wow, you’re like a dictionary — you add meaning to every conversation and also make me want to check if you’re outdated."

"I’m not saying I hate you, but I would unplug your life support to charge my phone."

"Congratulations! You’ve managed to turn 'mediocre' into a full-time career."

"Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I’m really feeling a connection… said no one ever to you."

"Oh, I’m sorry—did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?"

"I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right."

"Your opinion has been noted and immediately placed in the trash folder."

"Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica."

"Did we just become best friends because we both hate the same person?"

"I declare bankruptcy! …On this marriage!"

"I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."

"I’m not wearing pants, and I’m not afraid to use them!"

"Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?"

"I’m not mad. I’m just disappointmented."

"I’m basically your height, if you were shorter."

"I don’t need therapy. I just need everyone else to fix their problems."

"I’m not lazy. I’m in energy-saving mode."

"If I wanted to hear from an idiot, I’d just listen to my thoughts."

"I didn’t think it was possible, but you’ve managed to make small talk about the weather awkward."

"I’m not saying you’re dumb, but you’ve got to be at least a little confused to keep trying."

"The last time someone looked that stupid, they were standing next to a mirror."

"I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong."

"You bring so much joy into the room—especially when you leave."

"I’m not sure what makes you dumber: your choices or your hair."

"I’d slap you, but that would be animal abuse."

"You must be made of copper and tellurium because you’re Cu-Te."

"I’d insult you, but nature already did that job perfectly."

"If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive."

"You’re not completely useless—you can always serve as a bad example."

"I didn’t lose my mind—I gave it away to get some peace."

"I’d call you a tool, but tools are useful."

"I’m not weird. I’m limited edition."

"I’m not late. Everyone else is just early."

"I’m not ignoring you. I’m just prioritizing my mental health."

"I’m not arguing. I’m just passionately expressing my point with volume."

"I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop being idiots."

"I’m not short. I’m concentrated awesome."

"I’m not clumsy. The floor just hates me."

"I don’t snore. I dream I’m a motorcycle."

"I’m not lazy. I’m on energy-saving mode."

"I didn’t fail. I just found 10,000 ways that won’t work."

"I’m not weird. I’m a limited edition."

"I’m not talking to you. I’m just practicing my evil laugh."

"It’s just a flesh wound."

"I’ve seen worse." (Said while staring at a burning building)

"Today has been interesting."

"That could’ve gone better."

"Not ideal."

"It's slightly breezy out there." (During a tornado)

"I may have overestimated my abilities."

"This isn’t exactly going according to plan."

"I wouldn’t say it’s broken, just… creatively non-functional."

"He seems to have a minor anger issue."

"We might be slightly lost."

"It’s not a bug. It’s a feature."

"I’m not saying I’m Batman. I’m just saying no one has ever seen us together."

"I’m not arguing. I’m just explaining why I’m right… again."

"I’m not lazy. I’m in standby mode."

"I don’t need a hairstylist. My pillow gives me a new style every morning."

"I’m not short. I’m fun-sized."

"I don’t always procrastinate, but when I do, I’ll do it tomorrow."

"I’m not saying I’m perfect. I’m just saying I’m not wrong."

"I didn’t lose weight. I just found better clothes to wear."

"I’m not weird. I’m just like a human version of a pop-up ad."

"I don’t need therapy. I just need a nap and maybe a sandwich."

"I’m not old. I’m vintage."

"I’m not arguing. I’m just passionately disagreeing."

"You can’t handle the toothpaste!"

"Life is like a box of chocolates—especially when you eat them all and feel guilty."

"The truth hurts, especially when you’re lying."

"I believe in karma. That’s why I never return shopping carts."

"If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success."

"Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver."

"I’m not saying I’m Wonder Woman. I’m just saying I’ve never been seen in the same room as her."

"Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it."

"I don’t hold grudges. I remember facts."

"The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."

"I’m not late. I was intentionally optimizing my arrival time."

"I don’t need a plan. I thrive on chaos."

"I’M GONNA MAKE HIM AN OFFER HE CAN’T REFUSE!"

"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"

"I AM YOUR FATHER!"

"HERE’S JOHNNY!"

"THERE’S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!"

"I’LL BE BACK!"

"I’M THE KING OF THE WORLD!"

"WELL, THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY!"

"I HAVE A DREAM… TO FINISH THIS SNACK!"

"BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL!"

"I COMMAND YOU TO CEASE IMMEDIATELY!"

"THIS IS SPARTA!"

"I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!"

"I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough."

"I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know Y."

"I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised."

"I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."

"I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know U."

"I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me."

"I’m reading a book about mazes. I got lost in it."

"I asked the librarian if they had books about paranoia. They whispered, 'They’re right behind you…'"

"I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done."

"I’m terrified of elevators, so I’m taking steps to avoid them."

"I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now."

"That’s a lot of fish!"

"Look at all those chickens!"

"I drink your milkshake!"

"Is this your king?"

"Nobody puts Baby in a corner."

"Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn."

"You talkin’ to me?"

"Here’s looking at you, kid."

"May the Force be with you."

"Houston, we have a problem."

"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer."

"Life is like a box of chocolates."