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100+ Hilarious St. Valentine Quotes to Brighten Your Day
Valentine’s Day is a time to celebrate love, laughter, and everything in between. This article gives you a humorous take on the traditional expressions of affection with a collection of funny St. Valentine quotes. We've assembled ten unique sub-themes that cater to various aspects of love and relationships. Whether you're coupled up or flying solo, these quotes will bring a smile to your face. Dive into a world of witty remarks, playful humor, and clever quips that capture the true essence of love in all its quirky glory. From navigating relationship dynamics to embracing singlehood, these quotes will ensure your Valentine's Day is filled with both chuckles and charm.
Quotes about couple dynamics
"Love is being stupid together." - Paul Valery
"We’re like Romeo and Juliet. Except for the dying part." - Unknown
"You’re the peanut butter to my jelly." - Unknown
"You are my best friend, my human diary, and my other half." - Unknown
"I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it." - Unknown
"I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." - Rita Rudner
"Marriage is a workshop, where the husband works and the wife shops." - Unknown
"My greatest wish is to spend my whole life holding your hand, except I would hate that because I need both hands to eat pizza." - Unknown
"You stole my heart, but I’ll let you keep it." - Unknown
"If you can stay in love for more than two years, you’re on something." - Fran Lebowitz
"Together we make a pretty picture, but far apart we resemble a Picasso." - Unknown
"Love means never having to say ‘let’s split the bill.’" - Unknown
Quotes for newlyweds
"Husband: ‘What's for dinner?’ Wife: ‘Love.’ Husband: ‘Good. That’s the only thing on the menu.’" - Unknown
"First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity." - George Bernard Shaw
"You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams." - Dr. Seuss
"Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile." - Franklin P. Jones
"Marriages are made in heaven. So are thunder and lightning." - Clint Eastwood
"A wedding ring is the smallest handcuff ever made, I'm glad I'm wearing mine!" - Unknown
"If the newly married couple were as skilled at cooking as they are at loving, there would be no recipe necessary." - Unknown
"In marriage, each partner is to be a gardener, tending to the flowers instead of the weeds." - Unknown
"Once you’re married, life is about compromising: ‘Honey, let's take a vacation in Paris’, ‘United Paris? Let’s try Paris, Texas’." - Unknown
"Glad I married you. Beer tastes better with you than with anyone else." - Unknown
"What’s yours is mine and what’s mine is mine. It’s called marriage." - Unknown
"Marriage: the only war where you sleep with the enemy." - Unknown
Love quotes for singles
"I am single because I was born that way." - Mae West
"I am not single. I am in a long-standing relationship with adventure and fun." - Unknown
"Being single is smarter than being in the wrong relationship." - Unknown
"Valentine’s Day: Single awareness day. Coincidence? I think not." - Unknown
"Single is not a status. It's a word that describes a person who is strong enough to enjoy life without depending on others." - Unknown
"Why do they call it ‘single?’ Clearly, there should be a law against being as awesome by yourself." - Unknown
"Being single isn’t an isolated time, it’s a finished masterpiece." - Unknown
"Being single is like being a goalie in soccer. A lot of shoot-outs, but you got to choose when to dive." - Unknown
"I love being single. I'm always there for me!" - Unknown
"Single bells, single bells, single all the way!" - Unknown
"Being single gives you the freedom to have friends, not fish for compliments." - Unknown
"Roses are red, violets are blue. I'm single and fabulous – how about you?" - Unknown
Quotes about Valentine’s gifts
"I don't want flowers, I want a garden." - Unknown
"Chocolate: because no one reads cards anyway." - Unknown
"If I came with a label it would read: Love local, not imported." - Unknown
"Jewelry is just another word for candy, except it doesn't melt." - Unknown
"This Valentine's Day I'm giving you my heart… and letting you pay for dinner." - Unknown
"Roses are red, violets are blue. If you’ve got a gift, bring it right through!" - Unknown
"I told you my love was priceless. Then you showed up with diamonds." - Unknown
"Valentine's gifts should remind them they're out of dinner duty for the month." - Unknown
"This Valentine, just let love pay the bill." - Unknown
"You know I love you when I share my chocolate." - Unknown
"Seeing all those stuffed toys - for a moment, I thought Cupid had turned into Santa." - Unknown
"Love is priceless; gifts remind us of discounts!" - Unknown
Quotes about long-distance relationships
"Distance means so little when someone means so much." - Unknown
"Can miles truly separate? If you want to be with someone, aren't you already there?" - Richard Bach
"The ocean separates lands, not souls." - Munia Khan
"Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation." - Kahlil Gibran
"When you're loved, distance is no object." - Unknown
"Long distance is not for the lonely, it’s for the brave." - Unknown
"Love goes far beyond distance. You should give it a try on Mars." - Unknown
"Our relationship may be long distance, but my love runs faster than technology." - Unknown
"Can you hear love signaling? It’s so loud it reaches anywhere!" - Unknown
"If we're meant to be, distance can’t hinder us." - Unknown
"Love is crazy; it jumps from city to city like magic." - Unknown
"The best things in life are worth waiting for, even if distance tries to fool you." - Unknown
Funny love quotes for creative minds
"Love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That’s why your wife treats you like toxic waste." - Unknown
"Love without laughter is a summer day without sunshine." - Unknown
"You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how." - Rhett Butler
"You had me at ‘hello,’ but lost me at ‘goodbye’. Quite a short love story." - Unknown
"Love is a canvas furnished by nature and embroidered by imagination." - Voltaire
"Relationships are like a walk in the park: Jurassic Park." - Unknown
"Love is blind, in our case it’s also deaf, mute and slightly crazy." - Unknown
"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." - Groucho Marx
"I've fallen in love with chocolate, sorry, humans!" - Unknown
"Love without insanity isn’t true. That’s why Cupid wears diapers." - Unknown
"Loving you is a full-time job, unpaid but priceless." - Unknown
"Cupid's arrow caught my heart, but it clearly missed my mind." - Unknown
Quotes about relationship lessons
"A successful relationship requires falling in love multiple times, but always with the same person." - Unknown
"Sometimes you can’t see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others." - Ellen DeGeneres
"Love doesn’t make the world go 'round. It makes deserts turn into roses." - Unknown
"The best lesson of love is always taught by pizza: patience for the perfect slice!" - Unknown
"When in doubt, ask ‘What would Cupid do?’" - Unknown
"Do not wait until it is too late to say 'I love you,' love doesn’t wait!" - Unknown
"Life is the greatest lesson; love is the subtle teacher." - Unknown
"Love teaches you that caress can be sweeter when it is affection absorbed." - Unknown
"Harmony in love is learned, not taught." - Unknown
"In love, history repeats itself when we forget our own lessons." - Unknown
"The perfect relationship happens when you laugh at the same joke without saying a word." - Unknown
"Every love story should be stretched with imagination, not shortcuts." - Unknown
Sibling love quotes
"I smile because you are my sibling. I laugh because there’s nothing you can do about it." - Unknown
"My sibling has the best sibling in the world. Aren’t they lucky?" - Unknown
"If you think I’m crazy, wait until you meet my sibling!" - Unknown
"Brothers and sisters are as close as hands and feet." - Vietnamese Proverb
"We didn’t get along. But we’re family. And sometimes it’s the power pull for relationships." - Unknown
"Siblings: the only enemy you'll truly love." - Unknown
"Having siblings is like having a built-in squabble squad." - Unknown
"We’re siblings. Remember that when you borrow my clothes without asking!" - Unknown
"My sibling and I are partners in crime when our parents scold us." - Unknown
"Did it hurt? When you fell down from sibling-wide supremacy?" - Unknown
"Sibling love is heartfelt rivalry, amplified!" - Unknown
"Siblings: God's way of disappointing you perfectly!" - Unknown
Quotes for unexpected twists in love
"Do get married, if you want a faithful companion, just don’t leave the TV remote around." - Unknown
"We had words, but it was still mutual love, and pizzas solved them." - Unknown
"Sparks flew, but also dishes when we argued. Such is love!" - Unknown
"It's not love until your neighbor complains." - Unknown
"Even Cinderella found her slipper - I only got a sock!" - Unknown
"Love life is like a circus - lots of juggling and balance but must smile through." - Unknown
"We’re in love - oh, wait, I think we need translations." - Unknown
"Even cupid couldn’t clarify: Are we meant to kiss it out or talk it, love?" - Unknown
"Misunderstanding in love just means we know each other quite well." - Unknown
"Romeo found Juliet; mine should’ve had Wi-Fi so I could see them." - Unknown
"We had our moments of love, yet dishes piled up!" - Unknown
"In love, if it’s feeling upside down, look at it from another side." - Unknown
Love quotes for pet lovers
"Love is a four-legged word." - Unknown
"Sorry, I can't love you more, my dog just won that race." - Unknown
"Who needs chocolates when you can cuddle a puppy?" - Unknown
"He promised me the world; I chose the puppy instead." - Unknown
"Pets teach us unconditional love, and sometimes unconditional mess." - Unknown
"No matter how rough my Valentine goes, my fur buddy stays put!" - Unknown
"Your cat might steal your heart, but your dog will retrieve it soon!" - Unknown
"The greatest love should feel like when your pet runs to welcome you!" - Unknown
"If my love for you is lower than the love for my pet, don’t be surprised." - Unknown
"Love without fur isn’t true; said no pet owner ever!" - Unknown
"Pets make love paws-itively interesting." - Unknown
"Be the human your pet will fall in love with." - Unknown
Final words
In conclusion, this collection of funny St. Valentine quotes serves not only as a delightful reminder of love's light-heartedness but also its rich diversity. This selection aims to inspire laughter in every facet of the Valentine experience, whether you're navigating a couple's dynamics, celebrating newlywed bliss, or thriving in singlehood. Additionally, the quotes provide those in long-distance relationships or facing unexpected twists a means to cherish love's quirky aspects. From sibling bonds to pet devotion, each chosen quote illustrates how humor permeates each relationship layer. With laughter bridging any gap and celebration of life's unexpected moments, these quotes not only entertain but also enrich the Valentine's occasion with joyous charisma.
Discover over 100 funny St. Valentine quotes that will tickle your funny bone and make your Valentine’s Day unforgettable. Perfect for sharing with friends and loved ones, these quotes are sure to bring smiles and laughter.
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