100+ Best Superbad Movie Quotes That Are Hilariously Iconic

"I love you, man. I love you like a fat kid loves cake."

"We’re not changing! We’re just getting older together!"

"You’re my best friend. That’s why I can be honest with you."

"I don’t want to go to college and lose you."

"No matter what happens tonight, we stick together."

"You’re the only person who gets me, Seth."

"Even if we end up living in basements, we’ll do it together."

"Best friends don’t let best friends drink alone."

"We’ve been through everything. This is nothing."

"You’re stuck with me, whether you like it or not."

"If you bail on me now, I’ll never forgive you."

"We’re a team. Always have been, always will be."

"I’m not emotionally ready to give up my body yet."

"I’m not gay, but I love you, man."

"I’m gonna be the guy who has sex. That guy exists, right?"

"Why does everyone keep saying ‘period’ like it’s a bad thing?"

"I’m not trying to be cool. I’m trying to get laid."

"I’m not a pervert. I’m just really, really interested in sex."

"I’m not nervous. I’m just sweating because I’m hot."

"I didn’t mean to yell. I was just passionately disagreeing."

"I’m not immature. I’m just not ready for adult responsibilities."

"I’m not weird. I’m limited edition."

"I’m not desperate. I’m highly motivated."

"I’m not a loser. I’m a work in progress."

"I’ve never even kissed a girl. Not even on the cheek."

"I think I’m falling for Jules… or maybe I just need to pee."

"I don’t know how to talk to girls. I freeze up like a robot."

"I practiced kissing my hand all summer."

"I wrote her a letter, but then I burned it because it smelled like tears."

"I think she likes me. Or she pities me. Same thing, right?"

"I told her I had a girlfriend so she wouldn’t think I was desperate."

"I rehearsed this conversation in the mirror for three hours."

"I don’t want to be the guy who dies a virgin."

"I think I’m in love. Or it’s food poisoning."

"I don’t know what to say. My brain just shuts down."

"I wanted to impress her, so I lied about knowing French."

"My name is McLovin. And I’m going to Hawaii."

"I may be small, but I’m legal."

"I got fake ID. I feel like a real adult now."

"They call me Officer Fuzzy. It’s a badge of honor."

"I’m not scared. I’m exhilarated."

"I’ve never been this close to a cop car before."

"I think they respect me. Or they’re making fun of me. Either way, cool."

"I’m not running. I’m strategically retreating."

"I’ve seen every episode of COPS. I know how this works."

"I may be 18, but I’m still growing emotionally."

"I didn’t choose the McLovin life. The McLovin life chose me."

"I’m not irresponsible. I’m spontaneous."

"She’s not just pretty. She’s, like, soul-pretty."

"I’d give up video games for her. That’s serious."

"I don’t care if she doesn’t like me. I’ll still love her."

"Love is when you care more about her than your own dignity."

"I’d wait outside her house with a boombox if I owned one."

"I don’t want to be her boyfriend. I want to be her favorite person."

"I’d write her a song, but I don’t play any instruments."

"I’d fight a bear for her. A small bear, though."

"She makes me want to be better. Less sweaty."

"I don’t believe in fate, but I believe in her."

"If she smiled at me, I’d probably pass out."

"I don’t need sex. I just want her to know I exist."

"You’re not the boss of me! I’m not your sidekick!"

"You always ruin everything with your stupid ideas!"

"I’m not arguing. I’m clarifying my superior viewpoint."

"You’re the reason we’re lost. You said you knew the way!"

"You’re not mad at me. You’re mad at life. And your hairline."

"I’m not backing down. This is about principle!"

"You’re acting like I murdered your dog!"

"You’re overreacting. It’s just one beer!"

"I’m not apologizing. You started it by existing."

"You’re impossible to reason with. You’re like a raccoon with glasses."

"This isn’t about the money. It’s about trust!"

"You’re not the victim here. You’re the problem!"

"I thought growing up meant having more freedom. It just means more bills."

"I don’t want to grow up. I want to stay 17 forever."

"Adults don’t have it figured out. They’re just better at faking it."

"I used to think 18 was ancient. Now I’m terrified of 19."

"Growing up sucks. But at least you can buy beer."

"I don’t want to change. I just want to grow taller."

"I thought maturity meant wisdom. Turns out it’s just anxiety."

"I’m not ready to be responsible. I still forget to charge my phone."

"The future scares me. What if I become my dad?"

"I don’t fear death. I fear job interviews."

"I thought adulthood would feel different. It feels like homework."

"I don’t want to grow up. I just want to grow cooler."

"I’m not racist. I just hate everyone equally."

"We’re not cops. We’re life coaches with guns."

"I don’t need therapy. I have donuts and a siren."

"I joined the force for the free coffee."

"I’m not lazy. I’m energy-efficient."

"We’re not bad cops. We’re misunderstood artists."

"I patrol the streets so you don’t have to."

"I don’t chase criminals. I wait for them to get tired."

"I’m not corrupt. I’m just open to suggestions."

"We’re not role models. We’re cautionary tales."

"I became a cop so I could eat snacks during work."

"I don’t enforce laws. I interpret them creatively."

"I fake confidence until I either succeed or run away."

"I walk into rooms like I belong there. Then I panic."

"Confidence is just fear wearing a nice shirt."

"I act cool so no one sees how much I’m shaking."

"I speak loudly so people think I know what I’m talking about."

"I smile to hide the fact that I want to cry."

"I pretend I’ve done this before. Spoiler: I haven’t."

"I look people in the eye so they don’t see my soul leaving my body."

"I act like rejection doesn’t hurt. It does. A lot."

"I laugh at my mistakes so others don’t pity me."

"I wear confidence like a costume. It doesn’t fit well."

"I say ‘I’m fine’ even when I’m falling apart."

"Don’t worry, I’m McLovin’ it!"

"I’m not crying. You’re crying. My eyes are just watering."

"This is our moment. Let’s not blow it like last year’s science fair."

"I came here to dance, damn it, and that’s what I’m going to do!"

"We’re not losers. We’re pioneers of awkwardness."

"I don’t need luck. I’ve got hope and a half-charged phone."

"If we die tonight, at least we died trying."

"I’m not late. Everyone else is early."

"I didn’t fail. I just found 100 ways that don’t work."

"I’m not weird. I’m a limited collector’s edition."

"Life is short. So is my attention span."

"I’m not arguing. I’m passionately expressing my opinion."