Summary:
Dive into the eccentric and hilarious world of Zoolander with this collection of quotes drawn from the eye-catching and wildly entertaining movie. Celebrating the unique humor and unforgettable lines delivered by Derek Zoolander and his colorful cohorts, this article offers a delightful reminder of the film's satirical take on fashion, fame, and the quest for meaning. From the profound depth of “Blue Steel” to the existential challenges of a really, really, ridiculously good-looking life, these quotes encapsulate the quirky essence of the movie. Perfect for fans and newcomers alike, these quotes explore themes of identity, self-discovery, and absurdity through the lens of fashion satire.
Famous Zoolander Quotes
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is."
"What is this? A center for ants?!"
"You think that you're too cool for school, but I have a newsflash for you Walter Cronkite... you aren't."
"Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty."
"How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can't even fit inside the building?"
"You know, I love modeling. It's the best job in the world. It's so easy, and free clothes are a bonus. But I'm really starting to think that maybe I should do something more meaningful with my life, like... battle evil or something."
"I'm not an ambi-turner."
"I can dere-lick my own balls, thank you very much."
"You have to control the outcome of a match before it even happens."
"I'm glad I was wearing this diaper."
"Orange Mocha Frappuccino!"
"Maybe there's more to life than being really, really, really ridiculously good looking?"
Derek Zoolander's Inspirational Quotes
"There was a moment last night when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, 'Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman'."
"I'm sorry that good-looking people like us made you throw up and feel bad about yourself."
"I don't even know what the weather is like outside."
"This has been an emotional day for all of us. I think we should get naked."
"I guess I have a lot of things to ponder."
"A eugoogoolizer… one who speaks at funerals. Or did you think I'd be too stupid to know what a eugoogooly was?"
"Did you ever think that maybe there's more to life than being really, really, really, ridiculously good-looking?"
"You want me to dig deeper into the proverbial 'yo-me' and see what I discover?"
"I got the black lung pop."
"Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you and your 'do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives' so long as you can make a name for yourself as an investigative reporter no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way'... just so long as you can make a name for yourself as an investigative reporter no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way'?"
"I think I'm getting the black lung, pop."
"You wanted an intellectual who could solve our problems. Imagine the ego that might come from that, supreme loyalty and possibly being really, really, really, ridiculously good looking."
Hilarious Zoolander Quotes
"Todd! Are you not aware that I get farty and bloated with a foamy latte?"
"Earth to Matilda, I was at a day spa. Day, D-A-I-Y-E. Okay?"
"We're having an eugoogooly in here."
"I have problems with turns because I'm not an ambi-turner."
"You have no idea how hard it is being really, really ridiculously good looking."
"Hansel... so hot right now... Hansel."
"Back home, we call this 'dumber than a box of rocks.'"
"Why male models?"
"For serious, I’m not kidding around."
"The man has only one look, for Christ's sake! Blue Steel? Ferrari? Le Tigre? They're the same face! Doesn't anyone notice this? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!"
"I’m pretty sure there’s a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good-looking. And I plan on finding out what that is."
"Benedict Cumberbatch in a Cumber-batch of trouble."
Witty Zoolander Quotes
"It's that damn Hansel. He's so hot right now!"
"That Hansel’s so hot right now."
"Or are you here to tell me what a bad eugoogooly-ist I am?"
"You think you're too cool for school, but I got a newsflash for you – you aren't."
"Rufus said, ‘Just be cool.’ He said, ‘Secret fans … everywhere.’"
"Is there something I can do for you Hansel, like open garage doors, or feed cats or something?"
"I always wanted to work from a circular cell. It’s just feng shui."
"I don’t think I can take my precious baby boy ever going to work at a factory again!"
"I miss not knowing things with you."
"Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you and your do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives mentality?"
"You've been asleep for 15 years. I mean, the 80s were quite a different time."
"But why male models?"
Memorable Zoolander Quotes
"It's like Billy Zane says, 'Cool, but like awesome cool.' Not like, nerd cool."
"You’re a joke to me."
"You think you're too cool for school! But I've got a newsflash for you, Walter Cronkite... you aren't."
"This is the essence of beauty."
"Blue Steel will come in later, trust me."
"I’m gonna give it a go, turn the mill into the school, really get out there and do something good for humanity."
"Who you tryin’ to get crazy with, ese? Don’t you know I’m loco?"
"Because he threw up on me after eating goat cheese tacos."
"So you're kind of crazy, but you’re a super cool kind of crazy."
"I'm a pretty pretty princess."
"Thanks for the Lady Gaga sandwich."
"Your schooltie is on much straighter than your sense of responsibility."
Iconic Zoolander Quotes
"Who am I?"
"Apparently it's 'Der-li-fin'. So, hey, good for you!"
"Are you sure you want to marry this guy and his briefcase full of wax wings?"
"I’m pretty sure there’s a really rich eccentric guy somewhere I could marry and live off of.... "Okay, we're gonna take it slow.”"
"Thank you so much for farting in public around me."
"That's like asking Will Ferrell to not be funny."
"See, I think 'I'm pretty is right by my house', and then when I'm outside I’ll and be like, ‘Oh, hey I’m home!’ And I'll go in."
"I'm so sorry…I need to be like everyone else."
"This magnum power is devastating!"
"That needle totally almost hit me in the eye."
"True love can take 15 years or longer to stand the test of waiting."
"Oh, please! I'm being as serious as a lot of circuses once were back in the day.
Ridiculously Funny Zoolander Quotes
"Are you not aware that I get very bloated with a latte?"
"Do you understand I Styler the googledirectionbackusite face-off challenge?"
"When I was born, the doctor didn't cut the cord; he painted a bolt on my neck and said, ‘Deal with it.’"
"In space, they can't hear you Model."
"I dedicate this Magnum and all of its power to the strongest determination ever witnessed during fashion week."
"I've fallen, and in this outfit, I honestly don't want to get up."
"What is this? The future according to Zoolander goes on a science trip?"
"I mean, if Marilyn could love JFK and JFK still live out in the episode, now that was pretty cool, right?"
"I tried to think of something magical but all I can think of is seriously lantern fries."
"My father was a bee keeper. A professional bumble bee keeper."
"It's a good thing that the French are allergic to magazines, and Spanx eat at Arcz' soul."
"I could be like Derek Zoolander and totally turn left soon."
Derek's Quotes of Self-Discovery
"I think there’s a lot more to life than being really, really good-looking, and I plan on finding out what that is."
"I opened myself up and it was scary!"
"You mean I'm getting smarter, and I'm growing up?"
"You know, just because I'm good-looking, that doesn't mean I have to be great-looking, right?"
"Sometimes, it takes a little time on the catwalk of life to find who you really are."
"Maybe I am much more than what I appear."
"That's why you need people to believe in your unique brand of not-having-a-plan-worth-following."
"I tossed my hat over the wall and am hoping the household bunny doesn’t eat it."
"I demand this room – my schooltie department at Unicorn Holdings – fills up with all of my ego!"
"My runway equals my life. I guess every step on it makes me really, really better?"
"I facetimed my mom and told her I may reinvest in denim."
"I don't know who I am anymore without my squad – but I’m about to find out."
Challenging Life's Perspectives with Zoolander Quotes
"Who would you rather talk to, God-y or someone gorgeous?"
"I feel like a lady doesn't love her old dusty clothes but still keeps them around."
"You may want to travel but the carousel ride never takes you far enough."
"Do they teach boys to read 'No Admittance' effectively this good?"
"The essentials of good-looking people, travel bibles for millennials."
"I can’t go out there looking like I’m out of times."
"Fashion, self-awareness – pretty much equivalent."
"I think you'll find me. At the end of the gaze, you may find out that I don't care that I let go."
"Telling me there was more to life than being dumb was absolutely dumb of you."
"But this is the land that installed the soulful styles."
"Back when I was a literalist, life was simple."
"For the life of me, people expected cool fakes."
Timeless Zoolander Quotes
"I'm Zoolander, but who am I really?"
"The first preparatory clean garbage fashion show turned you to intention?"
"I did hear father read his papers solemnly."
"Avoid buried lede or face possible discovery."
"Sweating under the psychological umbrella should be exercise enough."
"The concept of loading in pretty small hits differently."
"Fashion belongs more to the people than power does."
"The journey of the longest cat walk delights and resonates from beyond."
"By stilettos and Chanel I find my true words."
"What is the quote's padua of finding peace, if not Zoolander in the ring of blessed trends?"
"On the surface of things, we find a unique niche."
"I commenced sketching on a real canvas."
Final words
In concluding our kaleidoscopic journey through Zoolander's world, these quotes offer a humorous yet pointed satire of the fashion industry wrapped in the outlandish charm of Derek Zoolander. They remind us to not take ourselves too seriously, encouraging an exploration of identity and personal growth even amidst humor and parody. The film’s iconic one-liners continue to resonate because they play on universal themes like vanity, identity crises, and self-discovery, all with a generous splash of absurdity. Whether you're a long-time fan rewatching for nostalgia or new to the movie's unique style, this collection captures the essence of Zoolander's improbable intelligence and irresistible charm, challenging us to find joy in the unexpected and the ridiculous.
